Unlucky or What?

My mojo’s jammed in the sofa
My rabbit’s foot fell down the loo
A black cat shat in my path today
And I skidded and fell in the poo
My charm bracelet rusted into my wrist
My mascot ran away to sea
I got stuck going under a ladder
And lost my jackpot ticket for the lottery
My lucky pants got shredded by next door’s cat
And my lucky socks shrank in the wash
I backed a horse that took the wrong course
And a pickpocket stole all my dosh
I accidentally reversed into a hearse
They day after my insurance expired
A thief took away my takeaway
And my lucky head hunter got fired
A genie appeared when I rubbed a lamp
But he only did vegan requests
I was offered some pleasure by a girl named Treasure
But she just had a sunken chest
I lost my virginity but found it again
A wishbone got lodged in my throat
My lucky day is light years away
And my ship coming in’s a toy boat
My Alexa got laryngitis
My satnav lost its sense of direction
My unbreakable watch broke in its box
And my mirror has run out of reflection
But who cares how the cards are falling
Let the demons their very worst do
For though my heart aches for luckier breaks
I still have great mates like you