Whatever Next?

I’ve ironed my pants, I’ve sorted my socks
I’ve trimmed my nose hairs, I’ve polished my rocks
I’ve tidied the garden and blitzed all the weeds
I’ve watched the squirrels dig up all my seeds
I’ve jet washed the patio and hosed down the cat
I’ve counted the bristles on my front door mat
I’ve been for a camping trip in my loft
I’ve fried some bacon just for the waft
I’ve cut the grass with scissors and watched the paint dry
I’ve watched funny U-tubes ‘til they made me cry
I’ve read everything from Gruffalo to Plato
I’ve googled recipes using only potato
I’ve eaten baked beans with a cocktail stick
I’ve bought Amazon out with a single click
I’ve made a playlist of all songs ever sung
I’ve learned how to say ‘lockdown’ in every tongue
I’ve opened the post in protective gear
I’ve desperately tried to ration my beer
I’ve rung all my friends, even those I don’t like
I’ve taught my budgie to ride a bike
I’ve painted the remote for my TV set
I’ve searched Google on Google to see if it breaks the Net
I’ve hidden the chocolate each day in different places
And videoed all my wife’s disappointed faces
I’ve split the atom and isolated new gases
I’ve even worked out the difference between lads and lasses
I’ve found the Holy Grail and the Golden Fleece
I’ve solved global warming and mastered world peace
I’ve done all this today.. but my only sorrow
Is what the hell can I do tomorrow?