Rodney

To my irreverent, film loving gay pal Rodney.

I’m Rodney Fernandes and it’s no Shot In The Dark
To say I’m getting Rocky and a bit Jurassic Park
Through life’s rich Patton, my Titanic wit
Has been a great Help, alongside my True Grit.
And my Basic Instinct for Bohemian Rhapsody
Will follow me, From Here To Eternity
So now I’m fifty, let me take a pause
To show why I’m such a Rebel Without a Cause

Eating- wise my Jaws have never been shy 
For Chocolat, Bananas or a Life of Pi
I just have to Seabiscuit and I have sinned  
It’s Gone In 60 seconds - and Gone With The Wind
And if good old blighty gets any wetter or windier
I shall take the African Queen on a Passage To India

And although my Love Story is not one of depravity
I regard The Good, The Bad and The Ugly with equal Gravity 
I’ve done the Full Monty and seen a Few Good Men
I’ve Dunkirk, Jerry Maguire and enjoyed Howard’s End
I’ve taken in Alfie and endured Saving Private Ryan
Did Rocket Man solo and shared The Life of Brian
I indulged in White Mischief and The Pianist hit the spot 
But Willy Wonka and Fanny by Gaslight – definitely not. 

And although this is no Country for Old Men
I would certainly Never Say Never Again
I’m just an old War Horse, a one-time Magnum Force
With Eyes Wide Shut who gets a bit sick
Of stuff like Free Willy and Moby Dick
Where life goes straight from Meet The Fokkers 
To 50 Shades Of Grey and then The Hurt Locker
So My Beautiful Mind with its increasingly fragility
Now errs on the side of Sense and Sensibility.
I approach Close Encounters with one eye on my Elf
And don’t open every Rear Window that presents itself

To my Comfort and Joy and save me going crazy
I’ve gone from Raging Bull to Driving Miss Daisy 
My Spotlight is now on my Network of friends
Inglorious Bastards on whom I can depend
And so dear reader.. this is really quite enough
From the buff for movies who watches movies in the buff.
As the Unforgiven Joker who loves Grapes of Wrath
I really wish for my Birthday you’d all just F**k off!